WOLF: February 2011

About WOLF

This blog is for those suffering from living in a marriage with a spouse who is self-absorbed. Ranging from mere selfishness to the personality disorder of Narcissism, society is replete with this characteristic. A marriage suffering from self-absorption is filled with confusion, unmet needs, loneliness, questions, and resentment. For the Christian committed to a covenant marriage, this is acutely painful as he or she begins to feel trapped in his or her own vows. The reality is there are faithful followers of Christ who are married to people who wear the mask of Christianity because it makes them look good, while their motives are self-centered rather than Christ-centered. Biblical prinicples and truths still apply, but the spouse of a Narcissist has these truths bashed over their head. There is hope, because Jesus also provided insight into dealing with Pharisees who bashed "truths" over other's heads.

Friday, February 4, 2011

Surving Valentine's Day With A Wolf

With Valentine's Day right around the corner there are reminders and expectations of what love "should be" all over the place. And, if you are in a marriage with a self-absorbed wolf it is hard to know how to prepare for this holiday. Wolves are very unpredictable on Valentine's Day.

They can decide it is the day they are going to be charming and engaging! They have sensed the strength you have been developing and may fear your leaving, so it is time to charm their way back in. Be careful! Ask yourself what is different about this time? Has there been a heart change? Remember King Herod acted as if you wanted to worship the new King who had just been born, but he actually intended to kill him.

Wolves can also decide that Valentine's Day is a day to stir up some trouble to avoid having to be intimate. They may instigate an arguement. Be prepared. Choose your words wisely. Don't fall into their trap!

Here is what is most imporant at the very core of Valentine's Day, is remembering that we had a Father who loved us SO much that He gave His only son to die for us, so we might have everlasting life.

God knows your pain! God knows the emptiness of your relationship! He wants you to keep turning to Him. He wants to provide all things for you, including helping you to see how very precious you are in His eyes!

Put your hope in God, rather than the Wolf you are married to this Valentine's Day and remember that God loves you more than anything!