In the modern day world, I have no doubt that Naomi would get diagnosed with PTSD or Complicated Grieving! She had lost her husband, both her sons, and she was living in a different country. In her day, a woman couldn't just get out there and take care of herself! Her culture made her dependent on men for provision. However, amidst all this loss and tragedy, she understood that God was the one who took care of her, no matter what!
When someone has suffered tragedy, there is a season of grieving and in that season considering others is difficult. Somehow Naomi managed to do this though. She had two daughter-in-laws, Ruth and Orpah, who had also just lost their husbands. Rather than keep them as her companions, she told them to go back to their families. This was a selfless move on Naomi's part! In so many ways it was in her best interest to have them stay with her. They were younger and had the potential for remarrying, guaranteeing her provision. They were a way for her to stay connected to her sense of family as they had been her sons wives. But, she knew they needed to move forward and not be tied to the past.
Interestingly, Orpah went home. I wonder why? She accepted the gift laid before her to have a fresh start and to stay in her homeland. Ruth, however, stayed. She took Naomi's selfless act and returned it with her own selfless act. What is surprising to me is Naomi's response. Somehow in Ruth's gift to stay with her, Naomi goes into deep despair. Rather than being able to see the blessing, she becomes blind by her loss. When Ruth reaches her homeland and is greeted by her friends, she tells them to call her Mara, meaning bitter. Ruth blames God for all her affliction. He has made her life bitter. He has taken everything away. Certainly, this is a normal reaction in grieving; to blame someone, to feel hopeless. Is it the comfort of Ruth companionship that allows Naomi to finally let go and grieve?
There are times in our lives when we will be consumed with issues. Both Ruth and Naomi had cause. However, Ruth was able to recognize that Naomi's loss was great. Yes, she had lost a husband, but Naomi had lost a husband and two sons. Ruth was able to step outside of her loss. Naomi wasn't.
I wonder what gave Ruth the ability to recognize this. What in her upbringing gave her such strength? She had been a Moab, which means she didn't even worship Israel's God. What allowed her to be selfless? What had gone on in her relationship with Naomi prior to the loss of their husbands/sons that Ruth became SO loyal? Ruth's character was revealed in this moment!
In your moments of suffering, what is revealed in your character? In no way is this question meant to infer that one shouldn't grieve. Greiving is healthy and important. But, in our grieving, are we able to still be selfless? Are we able to consider others? Ruth was. Naomi initially was, before she spiraled. Maybe God knew that Naomi would need someone to be the strong one for her. Is God calling you to be the strong one in your relationship?
Join me next week as we look at God's sovereignty as Ruth goes to the fields and finds the man of her dreams!
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